


Transparent Heart

by lightinthehall



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Anal Sex, Blindfolds, Crack, M/M, Oral Sex, Table Sex, bottom!Jensen, invisible!boys, sex while one of them is invisible
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-21
Updated: 2015-02-21
Packaged: 2018-03-14 08:01:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3402983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lightinthehall/pseuds/lightinthehall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Turning invisible every time he pops a boner is plenty to be ashamed about, in Jared’s opinion.</p><p>Written for the <a href="http://spn-reversebang.livejournal.com/">spn-reversebang challenge</a><br/><a href="http://amberdreams.livejournal.com/297592.html">Art Masterpost</a> by the wonderful amberdreams</p>
            </blockquote>





	Transparent Heart

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, thank you to the RB mods for all of their hard work! Such a great challenge to look forward to every year.  
> Secondly, thank you to sleepypercy for beta-ing this for me and for giving me such valuable input!  
> Third, THANK YOU THANK YOU to my artist, amberdreams who put up with my terrible schedule and misfortune trying to right this fic. :') You made such beautiful art my dear, I can't tell you how lucky I was to be paired with you. Thank you for all of your patience! WE DID IT!
> 
> [CHECK OUT THE ART HERE & PLS LEAVE HER SOME LOVE](http://amberdreams.livejournal.com/297592.html) <3

  
  


Jared is the happiest man in the world.

He’s walking-on-sunshine, floating-on-cotton-candy-clouds _happy_ , and it’d be absolutely disgusting if he could find it in himself to give a damn. Seriously, his cheeks actually hurt from smiling so darn much.

Waving at the curly-haired barista as he reaches the front of the line, he flips two fingers twice before pulling out his wallet. Moira knows his order well by now. “Sasquatch Special,” she calls out, making her co-workers chuckle, “and one for Loch Ness.”

Jared out-and-out grins at that, tucking a strand of his chin-length hair behind his ear before ducking his head to hide how pleased he is.

“Aren’t you a bouquet of sunbeams,” Moira says dryly, as Jared pays with a quick swipe of his card. “Your boy with you?” The answer’s on the tip of his tongue, but he’s already being pushed aside by the next caffeine-deficient patron so he just grins at her and points over his shoulder – making sure to stuff a few dollars in the ‘do not fear change’ tip jar.

Even the coffee shop music agrees with his peppy mood, breaking the marathon of depressing indie songs and filling the air with bouncy pop-lyrics. He meanders over to the end counter, joining the coffee-awaiting crowd consisting of a disgruntled businessman and a hooded teenage boy hovering by the creamer cartons. He beams brightly at both of them, receiving utterly blank looks in return.

His good mood is still on a high when he hears ‘ _Move it, Amp_ ’ muttered behind him. Momentarily panicking, he looks round to see that another kid has joined the waiting crowd, scowling at the hooded boy. The boy’s curling in on himself now, and Jared instinctively takes a step in between them, forcing a wider smile on his face.

“Problem?” he asks the second boy, smile switching from harmless-puppy to vaguely-threatening in an instant.

The kid – barely reaching Jared’s shoulder - takes one look at him and backs off, shaking his head. The hooded boy looks both relieved and grateful, his eyes darting to the other customers. He pulls his sweater sleeve down past his hands but not before Jared sees the flash of a blue _II_ bracelet around his wrist.

The sound of two green paper cups being set upon the counter suddenly remind Jared that he’s got someone waiting for him outside, and his floaty, happy feelings return just as quickly as they’d left. The teenage douchebag throws an incredulous look at the one cup piled dangerously high with whipped cream before shooting a backwards glance at Jared’s sizeable upper arms and toned stomach evident under his soft, dark grey shirt.

He resists the urge to smirk, simply slapping a lid on the other coffee: black, flat and boring. Walking out of the shop is a balancing act, trying not to topple his whipped mountain before he has a chance to consume it all.

“You realize that this defeats the purpose of our work-out.” At the sound of that voice Jared’s heart skips a beat, possibly invents a new rhythm entirely. An arm reaches around him to pluck the lidded coffee out of his hands, and his skin tingles at the close brush of skin and the teasing warmth behind his back. He hears Jensen groan happily at the first sip, completing Jared’s sense of contentment.

Jensen is freshly changed into his work clothes, light blue polo and dark slacks, short dirty blond hair still damp from the gym shower. Jared’s fingers twitch with the need to run his fingers through the damp strands, wants to mess it up to his satisfaction. Carefully avoiding further thoughts about Jensen and showers, he takes a moment to bask in Jensen’s satisfied smile, corner of his lips peeking above the coffee cup.

They both start later on Wednesdays, and they’ve started to fit in gym visits before work. Best idea Jared ever had.

“For you, maybe,” Jared retorts, ducking his head to lap at the top of the cream, turning to grin sunbeams at Jensen while using the other hand to pat his own stomach. Rolling his eyes, Jensen smacks him with the back of his hand, and they start walking down the sidewalk to Jensen’s office.

“You should come in with me next time – they’ve started calling you ‘Loch Ness’,” Jared muses. As much as Jensen loves the smell of coffee, he hasn’t ever come into the shop with him. The staff has clearly begun to question the existence of Jared’s mystery boyfriend.

Sometimes, Jared questions it himself. He can’t believe it’s only been a month since they first met, like everything he’s ever dared to dream.

“Trust me, I’m doing them a favour – nobody wants to see my grumpy face,” Jensen says, though Jared can tell he’s amused by the nickname.

“You’re right, you should never show your face in public,” Jared says, wrapping an arm around Jensen’s waist, tugging him closer to press a smacking kiss to Jensen’s forehead. “Then nobody can steal you away, and I’ll get to keep you forever.”

Jensen laughs, but the warm glance and adorable flush on his face is enough to settle the anxious roll of Jared’s stomach. Forever. God, if only. He’s never been in a relationship where he’s wanted to trust someone with all his secrets – with _everything_. It’s terrifying.

Of all places, he had run into Jensen at a nursing home where Jared had been doing work for the animal shelter. He’d brought a few puppies ‘round to meet the residents as part of a new morale-boosting program. The exposure was good – for both the animals and the seniors. A therapeutic exercise session was just finishing up when the dogs had gotten overexcited at the sight of New People, yipping and straining at their leashes.

Everyone in the room had been delighted, especially the young man that had been helping one of the residents with his joint rotation. Picking up the pure black lab that Jared had secretly nicknamed ‘Batman,’ the man had cooed and petted the dog before straightening up to face Jared fully.

One look at the physical therapist’s clover green eyes, and Jared had been hooked. Asked for his number on the spot.

He’s fully aware he’s speaking in clichés, his English teacher of a mother would cringe if she could hear his inner dialogue, but he just can’t help it. He and Jensen have seen each other nearly every day since their hazardous first date rock climbing, where he learned how wonderful it is being the uncoordinated straggler – Jensen’s an expert climber and incidentally, has an ass that looks glorious in shorts. A view that Jared thoroughly enjoyed as he lagged behind.

And it isn’t the fact that Jensen may be the most beautiful man Jared’s ever met. Jared’s always been a romantic, believed in falling in love with sunsets and sunrises and rose petals flying through the air. But it hadn’t been anything like that – just Jensen at the peak of the wall reaching down to pull Jared up by his hand, grip strong and firm and infallible. Just Jared failing to let go afterwards, too caught up in the electricity in the touch and the fluttering in his chest.

He’s not sure they ever really let go after that. Even now, they’re side-by-side on a fairly empty sidewalk and Jensen is close enough that their shoulders brush with every step. Jared glows with the knowledge that he’s been allowed in Jensen’s normally reserved bubble, knows after briefly meeting Jensen’s friends that even people he’s known for _years_ can’t get this close. It gives Jared hope.

The fitness centre’s glass exterior gleams brightly in the late morning sun, professional and inviting, but Jared couldn’t be less happy to see it. Relinquishing Jensen’s company is his least favourite part of the day. His despair must show because Jensen’s half-smiling as he tugs Jared to the side entrance, away from public view before pressing up close and hot and kissing Jared goodbye with soft lips and coffee-flavoured tongue.

Jensen shifts his leg between Jared’s, pushing right up against him hip to shoulder as his tongue teases then strokes in deeper into Jared’s mouth. It’s bolder than Jensen’s been before, and Jared’s left helpless, falling right into the kiss. He groans, pulling Jensen in even closer with his free hand despite the all-too-familiar cold trickling along his spine. He pushes it down in favour of the warmth building in his gut, ignoring the alarm bells ringing in his head.

He’s a second from breaking the kiss - _now, you have to get out now_ his frenzied mind tells him - but his hands clutch at Jensen’s polo, rather than push him away. The next moment, Jensen’s gone with a breathy, “I’ll see you later” slipping through the employee door, leaving Jared to quickly stumble half-dazed into the shaded adjacent alley. Halfway to hard and already missing Jensen, he breathes heavily, leaning back against the uneven brick wall of the opposite building. The cold finally breaks like a dam, flowing unabated down his back, and Jared shudders, hoping that nobody is walking past the alley right this moment. It’s like ice water trickling through his veins, settling at the surface of his skin. The chills ease after a moment and Jared looks up, catching his reflection mirrored in the glass of the fitness centre.

He sees his grey shirt clinging to the shape of his torso and heaving with every breath he takes, arms and neck empty – headless. His cup floating in mid-air, caramel-coloured rivulets tracing the contours of his invisible fist before dropping to the ground.

 _Too close,_ he thinks, _that was too close_.

It takes a few minutes for Jared to will away his hard-on, valiantly trying to banish thoughts of how Jensen had felt against him, the way he had _tasted_. This time, the cold radiates from the center of his chest, and he watches his reflection as his skin reappears, as if he’s being coloured in from torso to limbs. Finally, his face is fully visible again, his normally tanned skin is pale, and his mouth is curved into a frown.

 _Stupid, stupid, stupid_! He runs a hand over his face, breathing short and fast. He should have stopped Jensen – he should have stopped the kiss the second he felt the cold reaction sweep over him. He risked too much. But god _damn_ , how was he supposed to pull away when Jensen’s promising heat and sin with the press of his mouth?

He shakes off the shiver of arousal that flashes up his spine, in case it brings on another… episode. He needs to get it together. They’ve only known each other for a few weeks, but Jared _knows_ , knows right down to his core that he cannot lose Jensen. And if Jensen ever found out about him –

\- it’d be over.

Their relationship’s at the point where they’re both angling to push things further. And Jared _wants_ , like he’s never wanted before in his life – to touch Jensen, to trust him – to take him home and keep him. At this point, Jensen’s got him so wound up that Jared thinks his hand on Jared’s shoulder could undo him.

He’s always been so guarded with dates. It’s become a necessity to learn some serious self-control. And he isn’t a teenager anymore (and damn, puberty had been a terrible, terrible time for him) but he swears his dick operates on a hair trigger these days, thanks to Jensen.

Not wanting to chance being outed, Jared’s set himself a few ground rules. Absolutely no public displays of affection, anything beyond chaste kisses are reserved for dark rooms only, always have an escape route.

Hook ups were nothing but a bunch of close-calls and empty beds in the morning.

Besides, turning invisible every time he pops a boner is plenty to be ashamed about, in Jared’s opinion. After all, nobody really likes Amps – _freaks_ – not even harmless Class I’s like Jared.

It could be worse, he could’ve had Class IV venom-producing skin, or a manifestation that was contagious to others, like that poor pox boy. The thousands who’d been exposed during the Amplifier trials all presented differently, a spectrum of skin disorders worse than the ones they were trying to cure. Jared had only been three years old, just a regular toddler suffering from eczema when he’d received the new miracle treatment. The country’s scientists had proved it was safe. Within a few years, the first cases of extreme side effects were reported.

His parents had watched him closely growing up, nervously waiting for him to burst into flames – change his skin into bark – _anything_. ‘He’s one of the lucky ones,’ his doctor had told them, and his parents breathed a collective sigh of relief.

By the time puberty rolled around, it had become apparent that their doctor had been very, _very_ wrong.

Lucky for him, Dr. Morgan had deemed that situational invisibility was of no harm to anyone else, stamped ‘Class I’ on his file, and Jared was free to go, no wristband needed – “Just don’t let anyone trip over you.”

He’d been grateful that his doctor was sorely short on imagination.

It was like the origin story of every comic book superhero ever. Not for Jared (he is _not_ fighting evil using his erection-induced invisibility, thank you very much), but a few Amps who’d been lucky enough to manifest _useful_ skin mutations made the effort to ‘save the world’ and they’d even been celebrated for it. But then Colombus’ Northgrace Hospital had come down with 100 cases of radiation poisoning when an ambulance brought an unconscious, unregistered Amp to Emergency. The young man had appeared completely normal, and not a single person suspected that over the course of his seven-day recovery, he’d been spreading the toxic effects to unwitting patients and healthcare workers of the hospital.

There weren’t any more celebrations after that. Amps were quickly pushed into the fringes of society, lepers in the eyes of the _normal_.

Class I’s don’t need to wear identifying bracelets, and most public areas and work opportunities are open to them. They’re pretty much regular citizens with a few… quirks. It’s been years, not a single incident since then, thanks to the new regulations, but people are still afraid of Amps, no matter what the government classification system says.

With no obligation to declare himself, Jared didn’t have to tell a single soul outside his family about his Amp status. He’d passed through high school as a normal, while his Class II and Class III classmates were harassed and bullied. Jared defended them when he could, but there was only so much he could do, trying to keep his own secret under wraps. Those kids never had many friends, never had dates to the dance – most became total recluses, depending on their manifestation.

The boy in the coffee shop was proof of that.

He knows Jensen gets Amp patients sometimes, and Jensen doesn’t talk about them any differently, doesn’t wrinkle his nose in revulsion like he does when Jared chews with his mouth open. But those are his patients. Jared’s pretty sure _dating_ an Amp isn’t something that’s high on Jensen’s To-Do list, no matter how accepting he seems. Just imagining Jensen’s eyes flashing angry with disgust makes Jared sick to his stomach.

His phone vibrates – a text from the shelter - it’s ten past noon. _Ah crap_. He’s already late.

Quickly chucking the remains of his coffee cup into the nearby alley dumpster, he steps back out into the bright sun to make his way to the shelter, just a few blocks away.

If he’s truly in this for the long term, and Jared thinks he is, he’s going to have to buck up and find a way to tell Jensen eventually. Until then, he’s got to stick to the rules he made, damn it.

Unfortunately, the universe doesn’t seem to agree with this plan.

Jared’s beginning to regret their gym outings – at first it had been a great chance for them to spend more time together, just like all those relationship advice columns had said. But in hindsight, Jared didn’t need the visuals of a sweaty Jensen on his back, grunting with each effort to lift weights. And Jensen’s gym shorts must have shrunk in the wash or _something_ , because more often than not, the edge of the fabric rides up, exposing pale, freckled thighs as they run the track.

Jared especially didn’t need to know what Jensen looked like undressing in the locker room, or in the showers. The man practically walks around like he’s five seconds away from a porn scene, aloof and unawares. Jared does his best to discourage onlookers (the less attention on the two of them, the better, really), glaring and using his intimidating bulk. Jensen’s made a guy trip over his own feet on a treadmill, for God’s sake. Just from walking by. Jared is beginning to doubt his own self-restraint.

He has to excuse himself from time to time, taking a few more “water breaks” than would be considered normal – Jensen’s even started bringing extra bottles for him. It’d be touching if Jared wasn’t so mortified. Jared does feel guilty when Jensen goes to look for him after his shower, not noticing the way the steam curls around a large empty space in the next stall over.

With every passing day, he’s one step closer to being caught. Just last night, he’d dragged Jensen into a fast food place after they’d ended up on a midnight stroll along the river. From the décor, the restaurant must’ve been a McDonald’s once upon a time. Now renovated into a family-owned place, they got their food quickly and shared a small yellow and red booth that Jared couldn’t have fit in when he was _fifteen_ , let alone twenty-six. He hadn’t complained though, not with Jensen smiling at him from across the table, handsome even under the harsh fluorescent lighting.

He had been so preoccupied with his contentment – and not to mention the _food_ – that he hadn’t noticed Jensen’s legs rubbing against his underneath the table. It was a cramped space, sure, but there was no way that the rhythmic press of Jensen’s thigh along his was an accident.

Once he noticed it, he couldn’t _un_ -notice, and there was nowhere else for his legs to go. When Jensen’s knee had grazed maddeningly close to his dick, Jared had bashed his legs against the table in his haste to get to the nearest bathroom before he pulled a ghost act right in front of Jensen.

And here they are now - judging from the slow descent of the hand trailing down Jared’s back, Jensen is going right past exposing him and straight to _killing_ him. The solid heat of Jensen’s palm almost matches the blaze in his eyes, dark and promising beneath hooded eyelids. Green eyes meet his, and Jared has to hold back a groan when a pink tongue flashes out to moisten full, tempting lips.

Adjusting his sweaty grip on the dogs’ leashes, Jared’s leg jitters nervously, trying to keep his smile bright for the gaggle of old ladies gathered around him. He brought two border collies today, catching Jensen at the end of his appointment with the nursing home, and letting his patients meet the dogs. The dogs are a little older than most families are looking for, but Jared loves them. They bark and yap and grin freely, absolutely loving the cooing and attention, completely oblivious to their keeper’s internal freak out.

“You’ve been slouching again,” Jensen murmurs, hand briefly travelling up to press at Jared’s back before dipping decidedly lower than before. Jared’s spine straighten quickly when Jensen’s finger catches on the edge of his shorts, trying to subtly dodge Jensen’s groping. But he doesn’t want to. _God, he’s in so much trouble_.

He has no idea how Jensen’s keeping such a straight face. The bastard.

“I wouldn’t have to if you weren’t so short,” Jared retorts, frantically pushing down the first hint of cold, jerking away from the touch. Jensen’s eyebrows hitch up, and the hand that’s been casually teasing Jared finally slides off his back.

“Sorry ladies, but I have to get going,” Jensen says, reaching down to pet each of the dogs before turning his face upwards, smiling at the gathered crowd regretfully.

“Wait –“ _we’re supposed to go running after this,_ Jared thinks, wondering if Jensen got called back to the Centre. Sometimes he has to take on extra patients if his co-workers don’t show up or get stuck in long appointments. Jared’s about to ask him when Jensen stands, quickly gathering his work duffle, glancing back to be caught in three sets of puppy-eyed stares. The dogs are loathe to let any attention get away, and Jared just hates to see Jensen leave, period.

“I’ll catch you later,” Jensen says to him, eyes cast downwards to where his hands are clasped firmly around the duffle straps. He’s standing out of arm’s reach, and Jared can’t move towards him to hug him goodbye, not without untangling his legs from the twist of the leashes.

“Yeah,” Jared says, feeling lost and disappointed. “I’ll call you okay?”

He watches Jensen leave, staring at the door, part of him hoping Jensen would come back. There’s a sharp bark at his feet, and the two dogs paw at his jeans, demanding more pets. Jared obliges them, only feeling a fraction of the comfort warm fur and happy licks usually bring.

“How was work?”

Jensen shrugs, opting to take another bite of the baked shrimp appetizers they’d ordered to share. The strained smile on Jared’s face drops as soon as Jensen looks away. Despite the low lighting of the restaurant, he can see the tense line of Jensen’s shoulders. The conversation’s been stilted all night, and normally, Jared would be happy to fill up the silence with his babble – except.

Jensen’s on the other side of the booth, as far as possible from Jared, arms held tight to his sides. Their legs haven’t brushed _once_ , and sure, it’s more spacious than the fast food booth had been, but still. Unless Jensen is exploiting some sort of alternate dimension, Jared would have expected _at least_ an accidental foot tap by now.

He barely notices their food arrive, the smartly dressed waiter placing steaming plates of food in front of them. They’re at a fancier restaurant than their usual fare, a recommendation from one of Jensen’s co-workers.

There are gauzy curtains dressing up each booth, well-dressed patrons perched on dark leather seats. Jensen, of course, is wearing a white dress shirt that glows softly in the mood lighting. He looks good enough to be on a modelling shoot. Jared just wants to reach out and touch, but he can’t, not when Jensen’s sending up signals to _stay away_.

He’s pretty sure his secret’s safe. Which means he must’ve done something to upset Jensen, and for the life of him, he can’t figure out what it could be. He hasn’t been in many relationships, but it’s obvious that he needs to find a way to salvage this. Even if they don’t end up at his place tonight, he just wants them to be okay.

The last of their meal is set down and Jared thanks the waiter, automatically unwrapping his cutlery from the cloth napkin while stealing glances at Jensen through his bangs. Jared’s aching with the need to reach out to Jensen, pull him in closer and bring back some of their companionship.

Forlorn, he thinks of his apartment, everything set-up and ready for the two of them. Jensen’s been dropping hints all week, and Jared finally has it all planned out; he’s not ready to tell Jensen about the invisibility thing quite yet – but he’s taken every precaution to ensure Jensen doesn’t accidentally get a glimpse (or not) of his invisible self.

Jensen seems determined to inhale his entire meal, cutting into his steak with mechanical efficiency and following each bite with a spoonful of mashed potatoes. Jensen seems to be doing everything to avoid conversation, and it doesn’t help the pit building in Jared’s stomach as he pushes the garnish around with his spoon.

There’s ash in his mouth and acid in his stomach and he just can’t take it anymore.

Without thinking, he reaches across the table to place his hand over Jensen’s where it rests by his wine glass, tentatively closing around it. Jensen freezes, looking at him questioningly as he lowers his other hand, a bite of steak still speared on his fork.

“Jensen, did I do something wrong?” Anxiety is alive in his chest, settling itself into Jared’s lungs, stuttering his breath.

Blank, green eyes study him for a moment, gaze flickering to the hand on his then back up at Jared. He sighs, shaking his head. “I’ll get the bill.”

Jensen stands to fetch the waiter, and Jared lets him go, hand slipping down Jensen’s arm and falling back to the table.

Crossing the parking lot to Jensen’s dark blue SUV, Jensen stays a few steps ahead of him. Just a few hours ago, Jared had been hoping that Jensen would be coming over after dinner tonight. Now, he’s not even sure if he’ll be getting a ride home.

Jensen stops at the driver’s door, keys in hand, but he doesn’t unlock the doors. Jared hovers uncertainly next to him.

“Jensen – “ he has no idea what he’s going to say next, but all words leave him when Jensen suddenly kisses him, spinning him back against the car. Confusion quickly gives way to dizzying relief and he lets himself press back, only too happy to let Jensen nip and languidly suck at his lips and tongue. He lets his hands run up and down Jensen’s sides, tickling his ribs, relishing in the shudder echoing throughout Jensen’s body.

He leans himself back against the driver’s side door, wanting Jensen closer and all over him. Jensen easily fits himself between Jared’s legs, moving until they’re both pressed against each other from head to toe. His head is muddled, lost in the pleasantly slow kiss, never wanting to let Jensen go again.

Of course, that’s when the chill starts in, insidiously overlaying the warm hum of his building arousal and Jared struggles to suppress the feeling, begging mutated genetics for just a few seconds more. He wants to enjoy the feel of Jensen in his arms, wants this open affection without the worry. He grips at Jensen’s waist a little tighter. _Just this once_.

Jensen’s breath hitches, and he shifts, tantalizingly rubbing against Jared’s crotch and grabbing at his hips. The inner-cold is reaching dangerous levels now, near breaking point, and Jared pulls himself away from Jensen so abruptly that Jensen stumbles back to catch his balance. “Wait – stop,” Jared says between gasping breaths. “We need to stop.”

He looks up at Jensen, and it’s the restaurant all over again – Jensen retreating into himself and keeping his distance. This time though, there’s clear hurt on his face.

“Look, I’m sorry, don’t usually do this – I just really thought we – you,“ Jensen says, running a hand through his short hair. “It’s just, if you’re not into me – just tell me okay?”

He sounds so sad – so heartbroken, shaking his head dejectedly. Avoiding Jared’s eyes, Jensen retrieves his car keys from his pocket once again. “Nevermind, I’m a dumbass. I’m sorry for – I’ll just drive you home.”

Jared aches with the miserable tilt of Jensen’s mouth, arousal fading away and taking the cold with it. Jared would laugh at the ridiculousness of the notion, if he weren’t so upset. Not want _Jensen_?

“Jensen – “

“You don’t have to explain, Jared,” Jensen says, reaching around him to open the driver’s door.

It’s Jared’s turn to push Jensen up against the side of the car, leaning in close enough to notice the way Jensen’s breathing speeds up. Jared’s heart joins the fun, kicking up in response and _God_ , Jensen makes this so difficult.

“I _do_ want you, you idiot,” he says, kissing the skin just in front of Jensen’s ear. His secret’s caught in the space between his lips, threatening to tumble out, but he can’t tell him. Not tonight. He offers a bit of honesty instead, Jensen deserves that much. “Have to use all my self-control not to jump you every time I see you.”

Jensen’s shoulders jerk under him, and he’s shaking his head in denial. “But you keep pushing me away –“

 _Oh_. Realization hits him like an oncoming train. Jared doesn’t have a good answer to that – that’s _exactly_ what he’s been doing over the past week after all. Trying to push Jensen away because that’s the only way to keep himself in control. Jensen has _no idea_.

“Is it – if I’m going too fast or if it’s too soon or something,” Jensen mumbles into the space between them, voice quiet and unsure. Jared’s touched by the idea that Jensen would wait for him, but honestly, if Jared was a normal and Jensen had offered sex within ten minutes of meeting, it still wouldn’t have been soon enough.

He says the only thing he can think of, the invitation that’s been on the tip of his tongue all night.

“Come home with me, Jensen.”

The candles are melted down to their last inch by the time Jensen pushes him into the couch cushions, muttering incredulous words along the lines of ‘ _God damn rose petals_.’

Jared huffs a laugh against Jared’s lips. Okay. He may have overdone it- but in addition to his _preparations_ , Jared couldn’t resist decorating his entire apartment for tonight, knowing he’d get a reaction out of Jensen. The minute he’d seen the state of Jared’s apartment, Jensen had laughed, all the worry and tension from the evening gone.

It was cheesy, but he loves playing the romantic; it was worth seeing the flushed amusement on Jensen’s face. Jared’s never really had anyone to romance before. It’s a nice change to his hurried one-night stands.

And if the firm weight on top of him is any indication, Jensen likes it too.

Flickering shadows cover the walls, the low, the tiny flames the only source of fading, orange light.

Despite the near-darkness, Jared has an amazing view of Jensen straightening up to tug his shirt off, throwing it carelessly behind him. Jensen seems determined to lick every remnant taste of their hurried dinner out of Jared’s mouth, grinding down on top of him. Jared jerks up, sharp intake of breath lost between Jensen’s lips. There’s heat flowing through his veins, closely followed by that tell-tale cold wash.

Quickly flipping them over, he pulls back, settling his weight over Jensen’s hips. “I want to try something,” he says quietly, hurriedly ducking down to kiss swollen lips again. “Let me?”

Jensen just groans, shutting his eyes tight and nodding as he squirms underneath him. _God_ , Jared’s never seen anything so gorgeous. The cold’s close to breaking now, and his control is rapidly slipping. Wasting no more time, he reaches into his jeans back pocket to pull out the strip of fabric. He had slipped it off the doorknob as they entered the apartment earlier. The silk is smooth and soft in his hands.

“Lift up a bit, Jen,” he whispers, fingers tapping at Jensen’s neck. Jensen leans forward slightly. Jared’s fingers tremble, stumbling in their haste, but he easily fixes it across Jensen’s eyes, pulling the ends together to tie behind his head.

Just in time, too. His control breaks and the chill floods through him like a burst dam. Jared shudders on top of Jensen, his reflection in the glass coffee table disappearing.

“Jared?” Jensen traces the edge of the blindfold with his fingers, the other hand resting on Jared’s shoulder.

“Don’t take this off, okay?” He presses the edge back down. The blindfold is a simple black, the dark colour stark and elegant against the pale of Jensen’s freckled skin. He follows the line of fabric with his lips, kissing first at the curve of Jensen’s cheeks, before mouthing across Jensen’s face to nip at his ear. “Whatever you do.”

“But I want – “ Jensen ends off in a hiss, arching up as Jared unbuttons his jeans, palming the outline of Jensen’s erection firmly.

Jared makes quick work of his own shirt, ignoring the eerie look of his empty jeans, waistband of his boxers curving around his invisible hips. He has better things to look at. He nuzzles against the line of Jensen’s neck. “What do you want Jensen?”

Jensen licks his lips, opening and closing his mouth repeatedly, forming around silent words. A steady, embarrassed flush is working its way across the bridge of his nose. Jared loves it. He wants to kiss every inch of reddened skin, follow it down Jensen’s neck, right down to his chest.

He touches spit-slick lips, shuddering when Jensen’s tongue flicks at the pad of his finger, smooth and wet and teasing. Jensen’s blush deepens as he sucks Jared’s finger into his mouth, sucking at it lightly. Jared gasps when Jensen’s hand closer over Jared’s erection through his jeans. “I _want_.”

“Oh,” Jared says dumbly, feeling light-headed with arousal. He’s off Jensen as fast as he can, scrambling with his pants, shoving them down his legs with his boxers. He’s completely naked now, naked and Jensen wants to freaking _blow_ him. Blind-folded. Jesus. He nearly topples over in his haste, knees weak at just the though. Jensen’s reaching out for him, trying to find him with blind, wandering hands.

“Help me out here, man,” Jensen says, swinging his legs off the couch, and slowly lowering himself down. Jared steadies him as he goes, sitting on the edge, and guiding Jensen between his legs. He holds the curve of Jensen’s jaw, leading him closer as Jensen turns to kiss along the insides of Jared’s thighs. Jared doesn’t rush him, keeping his hand steady on Jensen as the man nips and licks at skin. Finally. Jensen’s every exhale is warm breath across Jared’s dick, Jensen leaning in even closer to breathe him in.

Unable to take the teasing any longer, Jared directs Jensen’s mouth to the base of his cock, nearly coming apart when Jensen tentatively licks along – up, then down to his balls, using his mouth to orient himself.

“ _Fuck,_ Jensen.” He slips his hand behind Jensen’s neck, trying to tug him closer. Jensen gets the idea, tracing his hand along Jared’s thighs again before wrapping it around the base of his dick. He gives a few, slow strokes before guiding it blindly into his mouth, opening wider to let the head in, lips closing around the tip. Jared bucks up at the sensation, pleasure sparking up his spine. Jensen is groaning too, head bobbing up then sinking a little further each time, tongue steadily pressing against the underside.

Jared’s eyes slip shut, encouragement and filth spilling from his lips. Jared would give anything to see Jensen’s lips wrapped wide around his cock, to watch the thick of him slide into that sinful mouth. For now, he loses himself in the sensation, short, aborted thrusts deeper into suction and heat. Jensen’s doing his damnedest to drive him crazy though, because he slips down lower, letting Jared’s cock hit the back of his throat before backing off. Cool air hits Jared’s dick as it slips out of Jensen’s mouth.

“Oh God, _please_ ,” he gasps, barely aware of Jensen’s own, panted breaths. “ _Jensen_.”

Jensen’s right back on him as if Jared issued a challenge, sucking harder, sinking deeper until Jared can feel his throat constrict tight around the head of his cock. Instinctively, Jensen’s hands push at Jared’s hips and Jared bucks into his hold, white overtaking his vision as Jensen swallows him down. His entire body goes tense and rigid before it all rushes away. He doesn’t register the familiar cold flash through him, as he falls bonelessly back into the couch cushions.

“Can I take the blindfold off now?” He hears Jensen ask, voice noticeably hoarse. _Fuck_.

Checking for his reflection in the TV screen, Jared tugs the blindfold off, pulling Jensen into his lap and shoving his pants down enough to close his hand around Jensen’s erection. Jensen moans, wrapping his arms around Jared’s neck and tangling his hands into his long hair. He thrusts desperately up into Jared’s grip, getting increasingly louder as Jared speeds his movements.

He watches Jensen’s face, head tilted back, eyes shut – lips shiny with spit and come. Jensen shouts his release, and his arms nearly choke off Jared’s air supply, but it’s the hottest thing Jared’s ever seen. He keeps his hand moving on Jensen’s dick, pumping him through his orgasm until he’s shuddering and weakly pushing him away.

It’s tempting to just fall back onto the couch together, but it’s no place for two fully grown men to sleep. Jared tugs off Jensen’s pants, keeping his boxers on, before grabbing his own off the floor. Jensen’s sleepy, heavy-lidded eyes peer up at him as Jared gathers him into his arms, carrying him down the hall to his bedroom.

It’s dark in the room, but Jared can tell that it’s morning, down-to-the-minute internal clock telling him it’s almost 6am, and he needs to get up. This morning’s a little different though, and he can’t help but smile when he registers the warm weight in his arms. Breathing in deeply, he smells the last vestiges of cologne and product mixed with fresh sweat in Jensen’s hair. It’s comforting, and it makes satisfaction settle into his bones. He’s tempted to snuggle right into that warmth, but if the heavy hardness between his legs is any indication, he needs to sneak into the bathroom before Jensen wakes up.

The heavy-duty curtains are drawn, over the shuttered windows, blocking out all possible light from the outside. It’s a good thing he has the layout of his bedroom memorized, or else he’d have to worry about tripping over furniture in the dark. The important thing is, even if Jensen had woken up early – and he knows Jensen doesn’t wake up short of five hits of the snooze button – he wouldn’t have noticed Jared’s morning wood invisibility. And it helps that Jensen’s wearing a sleep mask Jared slipped over his eyes before Jared had joined him in bed.

Carefully detaching himself from Jensen’s side, he slowly rolls onto his right arm, not wanting to shift the bed too much. He’s about to swing his legs over the edge when Jensen groans behind him – in a panic, Jared flings himself off the bed, landing with a thud onto the hardwood floor. He quickly shuffles closer to the bed, trying to stay out of sight. His shoulder aches from the fall, and he rubs at it sorely.

The bedroom falls into silence once again, and Jared quickly slips off his boxers so that he can cross the room without worrying about being seen once the bathroom light is on.

He wishes he could see Jensen in the dark, listens to his snorts and snuffles, imagines how he’d rub his face adorably on his pillow.

By the time he’s finished with his shower, he’s visible again and Jensen’s awake – bathroom lighting spilling into the room, showcasing Jensen propped up on his elbow, sleep mask pushed up his forehead, hair a mess as he blinks blearily at his surroundings. Safe now, Jared finally flips on the bedroom light. Sleepy eyes catch on Jared’s towel-covered bottom-half, and Jensen’s smile goes decidedly mischievous. “Good morning.”

“Good morning,” Jared agrees, kissing Jensen’s forehead as he passes the bed to get to his closet. He can tell Jensen’s disappointed he hasn’t forgone the towel and rejoined him on the bed, but the blindfold is still downstairs, and something tells him that he won’t be able to get away with shutting off the lights again. Not with the way Jensen’s gaze is trailing down his abs. But God, Jensen makes a hell of a tempting sight himself, bare chested and sleep-ruffled in a way that makes Jared want to ruffle him up some more. Grabbing a pair of cargo shorts, he glances back at Jensen, grinning when he notices the way Jensen’s eyes seem to follow his towel. “Bathroom’s through there, if you need it. There’s a new toothbrush in the cabinet.”

He hears Jensen sigh, the blankets rustling together as he gets off the bed. Jared turns around in time to see Jensen’s boxer-clad legs shuffle into the bathroom. He shakes off the flash of cold, focusing on trying to find a clean shirt from the pile of laundry behind his closet door.

Pulling on a loose white V-neck, he pads over to the bathroom, coming up behind Jensen where he’s bent over the sink, washing his face.

Unable to resist the temptation, Jared playfully smacks Jensen’s ass, causing him to yelp in surprise. A pink flush is beginning to climb Jensen’s face and Jared’s laughing, jumping out of the bathroom to get away from Jensen’s swatting.

“What’d you want for breakfast, Jen?” He’s halfway to the hallway when he hears a yell, and a loud scrape and crash. “ _Fuck._ Jared!”

Jared rushes back, stopping at the doorway to find the shower curtains pulled right off their rings, with the shower bar resting atop them in the tub. The bathroom’s a mess, his razor and toothpaste are sitting in the sink, and the floor mat is twisted up on the white tiled floor.

There’s no sign of Jensen. Jared’s heart stops.

“Jensen?”

A very familiar groan echoes off the walls, now that the curtain isn’t there to dampen the sound. Suspicion pings in the back of Jared’s head. But it _can’t_ be.

“Fuck.” The metal bar moves up, and the curtains move with it, shoved aside to reveal black boxers – legs open and spread apart as if in a sprawl.

Oh God.

“Well, this is embarrassing,” the floating boxers say, as the curtains shift and crinkle beneath the unseen weight. “Sorry, I must need more coffee than I thought. I was about to brush my teeth and I could’ve sworn I saw – _holy shit._ ”

It’s slightly disconcerting to see the curve of Jensen’s ass under his shorts without – well, the rest of him. The boxers are upright and facing the mirror above the sink, directly across from the shower.

Jared’s at a complete loss for words, his feet are rooted to the floor in his shock. Jensen must be some sort of Amp or – mind flashing back briefly to the sensation of Jensen’s throat swallowing around him – _Jared’s in a lot of trouble._

“Jensen,” he hazards. _Please, please let him be wrong_. “Are you – is this normal?”

“ _Normal?_ Does this look normal to you?” There’s a small pause in which Jared imagines Jensen gesturing towards himself. “I’m a – Jesus, I’m a _ghost_.”

Heart sinking, Jared winces as he cautiously moves towards Jensen. How can he possibly explain this? “N-not technically.”

The curtains shuffle again, imprints of two feet appearing on the damp bathroom mat. The toes are pointing right at Jared. “Technically? What’s that supposed to mean?”

That’s when Jared sees it – the point and slope of Jensen’s nose mid-air, steadily fading in to solid. He watches in terrified fascination as Jensen reappears before him, freckles and delectable skin returning to view.

“Jared? Technically what?” Jensen’s now-visible arms are crossed in front of his chest, and he’s looking at Jared with suspicion. Jared knows what follows next – disgust, hate. His stomach churns with apprehension and he drops his eyes, staring at Jensen’s feet.

Lifting an eyebrow at Jared’s silence, Jensen follows Jared’s line of sight down to his body and sighs in relief. “Oh thank God, it’s only temporary.”

“I’m sorry,” Jared blurts out, pulse loud and fast in his ears. He had tried so hard to avoid this conversation, but there’s no running from it now. “I think – I think this is my fault.”

When Jared finally brings himself to meet Jensen’s eyes, he’s caught in his blank, narrowed stare.

“Explain.”

Jared winces again, gesturing towards the bedroom. “Maybe you ought to sit down first.”

“Wow, hottest guy I ever met and he gives me some sort of invisibility STI.”

Jared eyes Jensen nervously, shifting on his feet, waiting for the inevitable freak out but – Jensen’s actually taking it quite well, lounging back on Jared’s bed. He wonders if the earlier shock helped Jensen digest the news that his boyfriend’s an Amp who turns invisible every time he springs an erection.

He breathes through the silence that follows, steeling himself rather than fleeing the room like he desperately wants to. He fiddles with the hem of his shirt, glad that he and Jensen are both wearing clothes for this conversation – he feels slightly less exposed this way.

“Jared.” Jensen’s tone is serious, sitting up properly now. He looks back at Jensen helplessly, waiting for the verdict. “You should’ve told me.”

“I know. I know, God, I’m so sorry. I just –“ Jared says, wishing he had a better answer, but in the end there’s only one thing to say. “I didn’t want to lose you.”

Jensen sighs, shaking his head. “And you thought passing on the invisibility trick was going to make me stay?”

“I didn’t know about that, I swear. The doctors said I was only a Class I – and nobody’s ever – uh done _that_ before?” Jared finishes weakly. Sure he’s received blow jobs in the past, but he’s never come in his partner’s mouth. Even though they couldn’t see him, people are usually too intimidated by his size to let it get that far.

Jensen’s face immediately turns red, the colour spreading across his cheeks and down to his chest and Jared gapes as Jensen slowly disappears again, newly reddened skin fading from view.

“Jensen, I think – I think your trigger is _blushing_.”

“Not again,” Jensen groans, the front of his shirt being tugged out as he no doubt inspects himself. “You’ve got to be kidding me,” he mumbles, fully invisible now.

“At least it’s better than getting triggered by a hard-on?” Jared tries for positivity, chewing on the edge of his lip.

“What if this doesn’t go away? I can’t go to work like this Jared, I’ll lose all my patients –“

“Right, because people hate Amps –“ Jared says bitterly, but he’s cut off by the touch of hands on his face.

“Hey.”

Jared’s heartbeat kicks up a notch, and he’s staring into the blank space he knows Jensen is occupying. When he speaks again, Jensen’s voice is firm. “I’d lose all my clients because nobody wants an invisible guy wandering around vulnerable half-dressed patients. It’s kind of pervy and unethical. Understand?”

Jensen slowly comes back into sight with every word, his face much closer than Jared had expected and Jared’s caught in that earnest, green-eyed stare.

“Y-yeah,” Jared breathes out. Jensen really isn’t freaking out like he thought he would. He’s beginning to hope – maybe – _maybe_.

“Any ideas on how to fix this, Sasquatch?”

“I could – I could call my doctor? He might know what to do.” Jared thinks briefly about possibly losing his own job at the shelter, how he’ll be moved up to Class III for this – how he’ll have to wear a red III bracelet for the rest of his life. But it’s only right. He could’ve really hurt Jensen; this is something he should’ve told him about from the start.

Jensen tilts his head and crosses his arms, mulling the idea over. “That sounds like our best bet.”

Grateful that at least Jensen hasn’t gone running for the hills just yet, Jared nods, moving to grab his cellphone from the night table when Jensen’s hand closes on his wrist. “I don’t have to be at work until Monday. I’ll stick around your place and we can wait the weekend. If I’m not back to normal by then, we can call the doctor okay?”

Sudden tears sting in Jared’s eyes, overwhelming gratitude closing his throat and there’s kind understanding in Jensen’s expression.

“So, you mentioned something about breakfast?”

Jensen’s acquired invisibility lasts until Saturday.

Jared takes on the responsibility to make sure the condition has truly passed – trying to rouse sweet blushes on Jensen’s face as often as possible. He learns quickly that surprise kisses and sneaky gropes cause Jensen to flail and flush and disappear. Sliding up behind Jensen as he fixes his hair in the bedroom mirror, tucking his chin over Jensen’s shoulder and whispering right into his ear – words like ‘ _gorgeous,’ and ‘beautiful’ and ‘mine’_ – also do the trick.

By some miracle, Jensen hadn’t broken up with Jared, didn’t even seem disgusted or disturbed by the idea of being an Amp at all. When Jared tentatively brings it up, Jensen shrugs.

“Look, I was pissed at first. But I get that you were scared,” Jensen says, rinsing some broccoli for Jared to cut. Jared gnaws at his lip guiltily, apology at the ready but Jensen continues, albeit quietly, “My older brother is an Amp. Class IV. We get to visit him at the Facility once in a while.”

Jared looks at Jensen in surprise, “You never told me that!”

“Never know who you can trust, right?” Jensen’s smile turns rueful.

Jared takes Jensen’s face in his hands, bringing their foreheads together. There’s still so much they need to discuss, so much that Jared needs to do to make it up to him. “I’m so sorry, Jensen.”

He kisses him then, sliding his tongue along Jensen’s lips before slipping into his mouth. Jensen groans then, dropping the vegetables into the sink to wrap his arms around Jared’s neck. Soon, Jared’s pushing Jensen up onto the counter, settling himself between Jensen’s spread legs.

The predictable icy feeling filters through his body as Jared tugs his borrowed loose-grey shirt up and off of Jensen. Jared slides his thumbs over Jensen’s newly exposed chest, running over sensitive nipples and making Jensen twitch in his arms. He has a first-row seat to the beginnings of Jensen’s blush, waiting for him to fade beneath his hands.

The rose colour spreads attractively over freckled skin, but the disappearing act doesn’t come. Jared huffs a deeply relieved laugh against Jensen’s throat.

“Jen - Jensen you’re okay, you’re not turning invisible anymore.” Jensen nearly jabs him with his chin, looking down at his still-visible self as quickly as he does. Jared sees heady relief mirrored in Jensen’s face, laughs again when Jensen blindly clutches at him, octopus limbs haphazardly wrapping around him. Jensen is kissing everywhere he can reach, lips landing on Jared’s brow, hair and ear.

“Jared – please,” Jensen begs, thrusting his hardening dick against Jared’s stomach. Jared picks him up easily, spinning them around and taking the few steps to the dining table, lowering Jensen and letting him sprawl across it. He pulls Jensen’s hips to the edge, swivelling their hips together.

He makes quick work of Jensen’s clothes, stripping him until Jensen’s naked and on his back, eyes unfocused, legs hanging off the table. He presses a kiss to Jensen’s thigh, smiling as it twitches beneath his touch. “Stay. I’ll be right back.”

Jared runs up to the bedroom, retrieving his bottle of lube and a few condoms, only pausing to take off the rest of his clothes before returning to the kitchen. Jensen’s right where he left him, cock hard and leaking against his stomach. He moves as quietly as possible, enjoying the way Jensen jumps as he grasps his thighs again. Teasingly mouthing over Jensen’s pretty, pretty dick and licking stripes over his balls gets him the writhing reaction he wanted: Jensen’s thighs flexing and straining in his large hands, filling the air with sexy little moans and panting breaths.

 _God_ , _he’s beautiful_ , Jared thinks. This may just be the first time he’s been able to have sex with someone in a fully lit room like this, and the view is driving him _crazy_.

He pours the some lube onto his fingers, immediately bringing them between Jensen’s legs. Rubbing soothingly at the ring of muscle, before slowly easing one finger inside. Jensen throws his head back, arms coming up and meeting air, trying to find Jared. He obligingly leans over Jensen, letting his invisible body cover him.

“Going to fuck you, Jen,” he murmurs lowly, licking along Jensen’s jaw, enjoying how Jensen shivers. Jensen’s hands find purchase on his shoulders, clutching at him tight when Jared slips in a second finger, then another.

“Do it, oh God, do it but – _fuck_ , use a condom this time, okay big guy?” Jensen stutters out, gasping and arching on the table when Jared rubs against his prostate, indecisively trying to move away from Jared’s grip and trying to shove down on his fingers.

Jared laughs, slipping his fingers out and letting Jensen see the condom in his other hand. He tears off the wrapping, before rolling the condom down his dick with minimal fumbling. The condom looks odd, stretched around his invisible cock – he thinks about how Jensen will look, held open by nothing but air.

Light-headed with arousal, he slicks himself up, holding the head of his cock to Jensen’s hole, then steadily pushing in. It’s hot, and tight and Jared has to stop himself from instantly thrusting all the way in. Instead, he breathes in and out slowly, watching with captivated with the sight of his condom-covered, otherwise invisible cock sinking into Jensen.

All the way inside, Jared pauses, before rocking gently back and forth, Jensen’s breath is hitching with his movements. His hands are all over Jensen’s body, stroking and massaging in sweeping, soothing motions.

His rocking quickly turns into rhythmic thrusting as Jensen’s legs wrap tighter around him, trying to get him to go faster. He whines when Jared continues his slow pace.

“Please, Jared, pleaseplease _please_ ,” Jensen begs again. He yelps when Jared suddenly thrusts in deeply, legs almost losing purchase around Jared, slipping off sweaty skin. Jared gains momentum with his thrusts, listening to Jensen moan for him, watching him twist and thrash in desperation. The heavy wooden table is shifting and inching away, but Jared couldn’t care less. He closes his hand around Jensen’s cock, grip tight and stroking fast and he revels in the way Jensen absolutely _loses_ it.

Jensen cries out, body arching and clenching around Jared, and he only pumps his hips twice more with Jensen falling apart so beautifully around him, before Jared is coming too. He pants out Jensen’s name, vision blurring and everything whiting out before him.

They both collapse on the table together, gasping breaths and clinging limbs.

Jared knows he must be visible again when Jensen kisses him, happy and deep. Eventually, he moves off of Jensen, letting him sit up on table while he chucks the condom into the trash.

“You’re beautiful you know that?” Jared turns around, startled at Jensen’s comment. Jensen is staring at the length of his body wistfully. “It’s too bad I won’t ever see you during sex.”

Jared feels his face heat, feeling embarrassed and exposed, naked in the bright light of the kitchen. He’s never thought about it before – Amps have never been cured from their condition before.

An overturned bag of powdered sugar that Jensen had brought out for their pancake breakfast catches his eye, and he sees the chocolate syrup still left on the counter.

He dips a finger into the spilled pile of sugar, an idea forming in his mind. With a mischievous smile tugging at his face, he traces his sugary finger along Jensen’s lips, leaving a trail of powdery white along plush pink skin.

“We’ll figure something out.”

END

**Author's Note:**

> AN: Thank you for reading!


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